Sunday, March 22, 2009
A Dream Within a Dream
I am not typically one who puts a lot of stock in dreams, or interpretation of dreams. Having said that, I do recognize that dreams CAN mean something. We certainly get that from Scripture. Even so, people can also go off half-cocked and put too much stock in what they dream.
I generally don't dream much. When I go to bed and off to sleep, I am out. Completely. Of course, there are those who will insist you always dream, and mostly don't remember what you dream. I won't argue the point. I still insist that I don't dream. But when I do, it's a doozy. I've had a recurring dream for the past five years at least. You tell me what you think is going on.
I have been a broadcaster for most of my adult life - from age 18 until 15 years ago when I began my current job out of broadcasting. Oh, I still do one radio program a week with one of the ministries with which I am involved, but it's not a full time occupation any longer. Even though I am out of "the business," I keep in touch with colleagues who still are in the business. It is amazing how much technology has changed in the last 15 years. And that might be the crux of my dreaming.
In my dream, I always go back to my first radio job. I began in telephone marketing, but always wanted to run the control board. I really didn't care if I was on the air -- I just wanted to punch those buttons and move those dials. But I had to be on the air, so I was.
I was pretty good at it too i.e. the mechanics. In fact, I can remember how things used to be when we had bad weather. The station I was at at the time had two transmitters. One was tube type, and the other was solid state. Once in a while, we had to switch between transmitters when one got knocked off the air. I was the only one in the station outside of the chief engineer who knew how to switch between the two without looking at the instructions. So I got called on quite a bit. But I am getting away from the point of this post -- the dream. So here it is.
I dream that I am back at that station. I go on the air, and am getting ready to read a newscast. But I get tongue-tied. My time to go on air comes after the network news stops, but I freeze. I can't say anything. In panic, I grab a tape to put in to play..a commercial, a public service announcement..anything. I punch the button, but it doesn't play. I cue up a record to play a song, but the turntable doesn't work. Everything I do is a mistake.
Then I am off the air in the sense of doing a board shift. I am in the news department as I was for many years. I am supposed to cover a city council meeting or a school board meeting. But I oversleep and miss the meeting. I am supposed to interview someone, but my tape recorder doesn't work. I know I am going to get in trouble, but I am trapped. There's nothing I can do.
What does all this mean? I am not someone who is typically not confident in what I can do. But in my dream, I am losing it. What is it? Is it because I am aging? Is it because I am a throwback to an earlier time and feel out of place in this present world? Is it because technology is outpacing me? Is it maybe some bad pizza from the night before?
I really don't know. I'd like some opinions.